5 Times A Smart Girl Does Something Stupid For Love
by Icysugalemon
Summary: 5 times a smart girl does something stupid for love... and 1 time she doesn't. A character study of the women of Grey's Anatomy, and the various relationships they get themselves into.
1. Addison

Title:** 5 times a smart girl does something stupid for love… and 1 time she doesn't.**

Dedication: **Lila2 **(look up her profile!) Because this fic was inspired by her similar Gossip Girl based prose-style pieces. This isn't a copy, it's my own work, but I owe her stories for the inspiration.

Summary: The women of Grey's Anatomy, and the stupid decisions they made in the name of love throughout the series, and then a decision that might have been the smartest one of them all. Various canon pairings will be explored. There'll be a few references to Private Practice where relevant. This is more character exploration than anything else.

Rating: If you're old enough to be appropriately watching the show, you're old enough to read this story. There'll be some non-explicit canon smut, some language, and reference to mature themes from the show itself. (K+/T)

Chapter 1: **Addison**

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Living in the trailer would have to have been the stupidest thing Addison Adrianne Forbes Montgomery-_Shepherd_ had ever done for love. Well, maybe staying in Seattle in the first place after finding out that her husband was not only _screwing_ some intern but was actually making doe eyes at her had actually been more stupid.

She was lying spread open on an exam table in the hospital's west wing, as far removed from the general chaos as possible, as a still-on-maternity-leave Miranda Bailey examined the poison oak littering her private parts. All this because she lived in a trailer, and had been walking _Meredith Grey's dog._ All because she loved Derek, and she wanted their marriage back, so she was willing to give his stupid trailer and his stupid new life in rainy Seattle a try, but it had been weeks since they'd put off signing the divorce papers and he still couldn't look her square in the eye.

Karma was definitely biting her in the vagina for– for what? For being in love with her husband, no matter what mistakes she made, and agreeing to live in a goddamn trailer on his newly-purchased land? Or was this about Mark, the fact that she _thought _she loved Mark and so she slept with him in a moment of weakness and vulnerability? Had it just been the fact that Derek had been an absentee spouse for a long time, and Mark was just _there_, but a classy Montgomery didn't do meaningless cheating sex (she wasn't her brother, for God's sake) and so she had needed it to _mean _something. So she moved in with Mark, and tried a relationship out for size. It quickly turned out that Mark loved his nurses and his sex more than he loved her, and she found herself having an abortion alone, because that wasn't how she had planned to have children, and Addison Montgomery was nothing if not a planner. Years later, she would remember something her mother Bizzy had always said: "People plan, and God laughs," and she would look back on her life and laugh at all the ironies too.

Right now, lying in the stirrups, all she could feel too honestly was that maybe, maybe the love had never been real or been enough anyway –with Mark or with Derek, because everyone knew Addison Forbes Montgomery wasn't a trailer sort of girl.

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**Reviews** are nice. **Thanks** for reading!

One more note: I have most of the characters and pairings I would like to explore already planned out, but if anyone makes a suggestion for a character I should write in the reviews, I'll take it into consideration and possible expand 5 times… into 6 times or 7 times.


	2. Callie

Title: **5 times a smart girl does something stupid for love… and 1 time she doesn't**

Dedication: **Lila2**, because this fic was inspired by her Gossip Girl/Glee similar-style prose pieces. My writing is my own, however. Characters/events belong to Shonda Rhimes and Grey's. Lila2's stories are good though, check them out.

Summary: The women of Grey's Anatomy, and the stupid decisions they make in the name of love throughout the series, and then, a decision that might have been the smartest one of them all. Various canon pairings will be explored. There may be references to Private Practice where relevant (not too many). This is more character exploration than anything else.

Rating: If you're old enough to be appropriately watching the show, you're old enough to be reading this fic. Expect mild, non-explicit smut scenes, language, and references to mature themes/events from the show itself. **(K+/T)**

Specifics: This chapter is set at the very beginning of season 10, within the first few episodes. It's a long one.

Chapter 2: **Callie**

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Letting Arizona back into her life _again_ was definitely the stupidest thing Callie knew she had ever done, period. Third time's the charm, right? She had a history of picking all the wrong lovers, the ones who cheated and/or died, as she'd so eloquently, tearfully explained to Derek a little over six months ago while curled up pathetically on his couch, polishing off a second bottle of his good red. George had cheated, and then _died_, out of nowhere, and it had been stupid of them to get married on a whim in a shotgun, Vegas-style ceremony while he was freshly grieving his dead dad, but that hadn't been an excuse for him to cheat and then lie to her face about it. She would've been happier explaining a divorce of two months to the people she worked with and to her family, than having the whole hospital see her humiliated the way she had been. And the guilt had nearly consumed her whole when George died, and then Stevens almost died, and that entire year had taken so many pieces from her that it had been forever and day before she felt complete again. She'd nearly destroyed herself over a stupid, stupid decision to get married on the spur of the moment, because she was young, and bold, and giving, and thought it really was love.

Then Mark had died, and she had actually been by his bedside sobbing into her hands while Richard turned off the monitors as per Mark's request. While he was never her lover, she had loved him all the same, maybe more than anyone else in the world before she met Arizona. Mark was the father of the best gift the universe had ever, ever given her, and the grief after the plane crash had torn her apart so thoroughly that she was scared of facing herself in the mirror, afraid to face the world without him. Her only consolation had been that Arizona had lived, her beautiful wife had survived, albeit one leg short.

And Arizona. Arizona had been a breath of fresh air, had been _exactly _what she'd needed. A little pep, a little sunshine, mixed in with appropriate levels of cynicism and sheer, indomitable will. But Arizona had a long, long history of bolting, physically _and _emotionally. First it had been because Arizona hadn't wanted children, ever, and that rift had gouged scars in her heart so deep that sometimes, she still wondered if Arizona loved Sofia as much as she said she did. She felt terrible for the thought, because the incredible depth of love for _their _daughter shone clear in Arizona's sparkling eyes, but she couldn't help her insecurities. She couldn't help hearing herself say, over and over again; _You don't want to have a baby because of a freaking sangria? _Sometimes she wondered if Arizona would have ever said she wanted children and a whole life with her if the hospital hadn't been shot up by a mentally deranged ex-patient.

Africa had been a low blow, and she knew that Arizona finally, _finally _understood how deep that blow had cut when Callie had had to spit the words out; _You had to fly across the world to get to me, Arizona, because you flew a whole world away without once looking back. _And that had been that. They'd recovered, they had, they had even gotten married after that and the wedding had been absolutely beautiful. They had dealt with the pregnancy and the car crash, and Arizona had been wonderfully supportive and patient in the long weeks following the car crash, but things weren't the same. Another little piece of trust had already been permanently chipped away by that point.

The years hadn't been easy on them. Between Arizona's miscarriage and the loss of her leg, her wife had slowly turned into a monster she no longer recognized, someone selfish, someone who maybe, maybe had always been a little selfish, while Callie had always been a little too generous with her heart.

She had moved heaven and earth to be with Arizona, dealt with the fallout with her mother, and at a point, her father, dealt with her trust fund getting slashed and having to live less affluently than she was used to, but it had been for love, and she had loved every minute of staying home eating cold pizza out of cardboard boxes while lying half-clothed in bed, instead of dressing up and dining at a swanky restaurant for their first date. She had gladly dealt with all of it because Arizona was _it_, she had known it maybe even from the moment the blonde had spontaneously kissed her in the dirty bathroom stall of Joe's bar. But now Arizona had left her stranded, _again_, and Callie hated herself for _letting _Arizona do this to her, _yet again_. She hated herself for being this stupid, for not seeing that the way things had been going lately, maybe Arizona was bound to cheat on her sooner or later.

The cheating hadn't been what had hurt her most though, oh no. As Arizona stood there trying to defend herself, defend her actions, it had been that sentence, that one string of words put together that cut most. _You weren't on the plane, Callie! You don't know what it's like! _She had tried, so hard, for almost a year, to be so incredibly patient and understanding with Arizona; she had _tried _so damn hard. She couldn't comprehend being told that she didn't understand what this was like. _It's my life too, dammit! There's nowhere for me to go! This is my life too now! _She hadn't lost a leg. She had lost Mark. Sofia asked about her daddy, sometimes, and she had lost the ability to tell her daughter that daddy was gone without choking up and bursting into sobs as soon as Sofia's attention was otherwise occupied. She had lost her wife. She had lost her dignity and lost the pride she had always held in herself, because she felt so incredibly ashamed at herself for being in this position _again_, at the mercy of the hospital gossip, because Callie Torres was cheated on yet again, and was hurt yet again, so what else is new? She hated herself for giving Arizona this much power to hurt her, and above all, she was angry at herself for _staying_, when all Arizona ever seemed to do was look for excuses to run.

But she loved Arizona, so she had let her move back home, even after the cheating, even after Leah Murphy, because she was so in love with this incredible woman, despite everything. She knew she was being stupid. Every single time that she let Arizona back into her life, she knew she would get hurt again, and she knew she was being utterly stupid, and she went ahead and let Arizona back in anyway, all because she couldn't help being head over heels in love. _You're so good at walking away, so get your crap out of my apartment. I don't doubt even for a second, Arizona, that if I let you back into my life, you WILL hurt me again. _She had known from day one that Arizona Robbins had a reputation as a heartbreaker, and it had proved itself 100% true, and then some.

Once, they had been the stable couple, the couple that everyone else had wanted to be. That had been before the beginning of the end, when she was still growing cartilage and Arizona hadn't yet said that she never wanted children and nobody had tried to blow up the hospital yet.

They weren't those people anymore. They had slowly been chipping away at those bonds for a long time now, and Arizona had been taking pieces of Callie for so long, long before Callie took a leg away from her (and gave her back her life in the same breath), that she wasn't sure who she was supposed to be anymore. She wasn't the girl who danced in her underwear anymore, carefree and wild. She wasn't stable and settled into a life filled with certainties and small, daily arguments over Chinese vs. pizza for dinner.

Continuing to hold onto a relationship, to a love that had warped so much, too much, over time, to the people that they used to be was the stupidest decision she had made in a long, long time, and, staring down at the blank divorce papers lying on the kitchen table of _her _apartment, she realized that it wasn't a decision she wanted to make anymore.

_All of these lines across my face_

_ Tell you the story of who I am_

_ So many stories of where I've been_

_ And how I got to where I am_

_ But these stories don't mean anything_

_ When you've got no one to tell them to, it's true…_

_ I was made for you. _

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**Thanks** for reading, **reviews** are always nice… especially signed-in ones! Only nice or constructive reviews, please. I don't tolerate meanness. Criticism is welcomed as long as it's kind and constructive.

Updates will usually not come this fast, but they will come whenever I can manage them!


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